Explorers find uncontacted civilization on the far side of Duwamish
Hidden White Center civilization discovered.
Origins remain a mystery.
New photos of “uncontacted” members of the South Park community have intensified recent debate over how such residents are labeled and what strategies can be employed to protect them from gentrification. Among the key questions: Should these people be contacted? Are they truly as isolated as we may think?
The photos were released last week by a Georgetown exploratory group seeking to prove the existence of Loretta’s, the fabled “sister tavern” to the Nine Pound Hammer by fording the Duwamish River. What they found on the other side was even more miraculous.
“We had to take photos, or else we feared no one would believe us,” said Trip Dillinger, a glass blower and steampunk aficionado. “A whole group of people untouched by modern eyes.”
Dillinger described the people as having a vaguely familiar nature and an odd, rapid form of speech.
“I tried to keep my contact with them to a minimum,” he explained. “I didn’t want to impress my values on their possibly fragile culture.”
Professor Edwin Daniels from the University of Washington has a theory about how these people may have arrived in South Park.
“My research has shown that there may have been some form of span, or ‘bridge,’ if you will, connecting South Park to the rest of Seattle as late as last June, which would have allowed commerce and travel between South Park and White Center, not to mention Georgetown. It’s possible that these people migrated to South Park from one of those places and, against all incentive to the contrary, stayed even when the bridge disappeared. Actually, even that is too fantastic to believe. They must have been caught unaware and trapped after it vanished.”
Dr. Angela McKeen, who followed-up on Dillinger’s claims with a Seattle University-funded expedition is not convinced by the “bridge” theory.
“There’s more going on here than meets they eye. I was able to communicate with a local guide, who spoke of a secret passage that lead to a place called Highland Park, or even the fabled city of Tukwila. He mentioned they have a Trader Joe’s there.”
Daniels finds this highly unlikely.
“The idea that there are any places other than Seattle where someone would want to live is preposterous. Next you’re going to tell me that the ‘mystery buildings’ on the other side of Lake Washington are full of people.”
"Like" us on Facebook to get your daily dose of Seattle humor.
Short URL: http://theseattlesalmon.com/?p=1613
Posted by pgude on 11:59am, Tue, Feb 22 2011. Filed under Featured Stories, Local.
You may follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0.
You can leave a response or trackback to this entry
Stay out of South Park, nothing to see here. We are neither cool, nor interesting nor unique, we are not cheap and dont have funky old cool places to rent , dont want artists and creative types hanging around and building art in the industrial park by the river.
There never was a bridge, repeat, there never was a bridge.
indeed, Cracker, and AMEN. very well put.
[...] New photos of “uncontacted” members of the South Park community have intensified recent debate over how such residents are labeled and what strategies can be employed to protect them from gentrification. Among the key questions: Should these people be contacted? Are they truly as isolated as we may think? read more at Seattle Salmon [...]