“Oh goodie!” exclaimed Mike Davis, NASA’s director of near-earth astronomy, after he looked into his telescope this morning and found a giant, planet-killing asteroid–in the shape of a jaunty little horse–on doomsday collision course set for Earth. Los Alamos, NM–A giant planet-killing asteroid, nicknamed the “Trojan” asteroid, is on a collision course with the planet [...]
Attitude problems persist with immature artificial intelligence technology The launch of NASA’s robot probe, Curiosity, marks the first use of a controversial artificial intelligence. The technology has raised ethical concerns as the robot can actually think for itself – though is not necessarily thoughtful. The Seattle Salmon was granted this exclusive e-mail interview with Curiosity [...]
How do you like them Apples? There is a lot of heretical complaining online about the alleged iPhone 4s battery running out of power too quickly. Some have even had the temerity to blame the Siri app (Jobs’ last gift to the Apple faithful), for the excessive power use. While Apple’s stylishly jackbooted thugs chase [...]
Abortion bans aren’t the only changes in store as Providence’s Catholic leadership lays down God’s laws on Swedish (Pill Hill) Swedish and Providence Medical Centers announced last week a merger that will force Swedish to stop performing abortions due to Providence’s Catholic, and “totally square” leadership. In its place will be the medieval birth control [...]
Steve Jobs on the Seattle Salmon Although there are many mentions of Steve Jobs and Apple in our archive, the following article, published January 24th, 2011, focused on the importance of Steve Jobs to Apple and cutting-edge industrial design: Apple’s Creative Team Ponders Next Management Move
Resentment grows as users most embarrassing moments revealed Meghan Dilks has been a moderate facebook user since 2009. Although she heard rumor of the new changes that would break down the last wall of user personal dignity, she failed to take any measures to disable the latest over-sharing applications automatically loaded to her profile. Dilks [...]
For paleontologists, a recently unearthed mass of amber–fossilized tree sap–containing dinosaur feathers, draws a clearer picture of what dinosaurs actually looked like. The feathers discovered in the ancient amber belonged to a family of dinosaurs classified as Sesameosaurus (/ˈsɛsəmi.ɵˈsɔrəs/).
Seattle-Local enviro leaders, the Bullitt Foundation, recently released plans to build the most energy efficient and environmentally sustainable building ever. “This building will be so efficient and high tech, when completed it will make the LED light bulbs look like toaster ovens.” said the foundation’s Manager for Tree Hugging, Nancy Boyce. The six story building, [...]
(Originally published January 24, 2011) The design-focused extraterrestrials meet to regroup as their human avatar malfunctions. Kuiper Belt – Apple’s design group met today to discuss next steps as Steve Jobs’ health falters. The team, composed entirely of life forms described as gaseous entities of pure aesthetic design, came together to reforge Apple’s products in [...]
“Oh goodie!” exclaimed Mike Davis, NASA’s director of near-earth astronomy, after he looked into his telescope this morning and found a giant asteroid in the shape of a jaunty little horse heading straight for Earth. Los Alamos, NM–A giant planet-killing asteroid, nicknamed the “Trojan” asteroid, is on a collision course with the planet Earth. While [...]
