It was recently revealed by author Kevin Sessums that in an interview with Elizabeth Taylor back in 1997 she revealed that James Dean had been molested by a minister at the age of 11. Talyor told Sessums to keep the comment off the record until after her death. Besides the Dean bombshell, there are a [...]
OMG in OED! Last week we were all inundated with annoying articles that the internet abbreviation OMG was put into the Oxford English Dictionary. Though we are all sure that Chaucer is rolling over in his grave, we were more interested in what abbreviations did not make the cut. Seattle Salmon Wikisquirts Investigators were able [...]
Sales of gross mega-muffin variety packs expected to triple Issaquah – The largest supporter of liquor law reform is making plans for an entirely new landscape in which Washingtonians will be getting wasted. Costco, confident that legislation allowing retail sales of liquor will pass, is already envisioning the next frontier: wholesale marijuana. “We’d be doing [...]
Ty Pennington Rebuilds the President, one hope at a time After a hard winter being pummeled by Middle East shit storms and blue collar job famine, President Obama did not at first notice that his own house was falling into disrepair. Sure, he sometimes heard the blue dogs chewing at the fence or noticed the [...]
Xbox addict finds purpose in evading civic duty When Jason Haller received his jury duty summons, he did something he hadn’t done in almost two years: he got up off the couch, turned off his Xbox, and got to work. Unemployed since mid-2009, Haller was shocked to receive the summons. “I’m not sure how they [...]
Charlotte location allowed UNC to pull out all local the stops Charlotte-The final minutes of the Huskies loss to the UNC Tar Heels in the third round of the NCAA tournament will be remembered for allegedly sloppy mistakes indicative of a season of unrealized talent. The real story of their end is much more insidious. [...]
Rash of latest teacher student sex scandals linked to controversial site In response to the insatiable appetites Northwest educators display for single, swinging teens, a new website has launched to help connect those who love Twilight with those in their twilight years. MaryKconnections.com is a portal for horny teachers tired of trying to interpret the [...]
District scrambling to manage fallout of the “I am your father” controversy In the face of nose-diving test scores and leadership scandals, Seattle Public Schools made a desperate effort to pump enthusiasm back to the classroom. Taking their cues from an exhibit at the Pacific “Science” Center and gambling like a desperate Han Solo, Seattle [...]
Seattle-2010 saw this region reaching a 30 year high in Syphilis cases amongst straight, gay and bisexual residents. After intensive research Puget Sound Health officials released a report yesterday determining most of the causes for last year’s growth. Dr. Peter Chu, the report’s lead author commented on each cause for the Seattle Salmon. Nine Seahawk [...]
Fire Training for Foster Parents EVERETT, Wash. — After a tragic 2008 house fire in Snohomish County, Washington State commissioned a study on ways to better prepare foster parents for the riskiest children living in their home. The final draft is detailed the need for “Fire Training” which surprised some as to imply a serious [...]
